Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Hidden Treasure Trove of Past Eimer Editorials

So, sometimes, I like to Google my name and see what comes up.

Hey! It's not a narcissistic past time at all (well, sorta), but more of a litmus test to ensure there's plenty of positive and not a lot of negative when people are looking you up online.

I try to tell this to all of the new graduates I come across who are looking for a job.

Google yourself and get rid of the negative shit. It's easy. And it's important. I mean, I wouldn't want a prospective employer to come across this picture of me on my honeymoon. (Well, in hindsight, I guess linking to said picture on an open blog is not going to help my employment opportunities, either.)

But I digress.

So, I was Googling myself and came across a link on Google that contained scanned-in newspapers from Westland News circa 2004. I started browsing and came across three editorials that I wrote for the newspaper at the time. Despite some type-os (damn you, editors!!), they're pretty entertaining reads. They brought back some very fond memories of the Suburban News Publication news crew.

During that time, I didn't make much money, but boy did I have fun writing and collaborating with a smart, talented and well-educated team.

So, without further adieu, please enjoy my SNP editorials covering a Canadian fishing trip, javelin in Ohio and deer hunting (and enjoy the good-looking youthful face, by the way):




One Sentence Movie Review - Mad Max: Fury Road


Tuesday, June 30, 2015

One Sentence Movie Review - Jurassic World

Thursday, May 14, 2015

My 2015 Sorta, Maybe, Must-See Summer Movies List



Summer. It turns me upside down. Summer. Summer. Summer. It's like a freaking merry-go-round ... especially when it comes to sorting through the shitty summer movie line-up and coming up with a list of must-see summer movies.

So, what's this list mean to you. I'm really not sure, really.

It probably means eschewing the sun that you waited, oh, about six months to come back to Ohio, and - instead - huddling yourself into a dark theater and drinking one, two (or maybe even three) beers that you snuck into the theater.

Hint: Smuggle them into the theater via a rolled up jacket because you get (ahem) 'cold' in the theater.

So, here's my list. I would pick more. But let's be honest, we're talking about summer movies here, people. Anyway, enjoy.

Avengers (In Theaters)
Already saw it, suckas! Please excuse the shameless plug of my One Sentence Movie Reviews via Twitter (please follow).
Mad Max: Fury Road (In Theaters)
Consider me intrigued. Charlize Theron, who still looks hot with a bald head and mechanical arm. Tom Hardy. Bunch of crazy looking freaks in the desert. Not to mention non-computerized special effects. The man, the myth, George Miller not directing dancing penguins. I'm in. May go see it this weekend matter of fact.

Tomorrowland (May 22)
When it comes to creating top-notch films, Director Brad Bird has the Midas touch. I mean look at his resume (Iron Giant, Ratatouille, The Incredibles, Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, The Simpsons early episodes). First trailer had me intrigued. Second trailer, with a little more violence, little more action sealed the deal. This should be a fun ride. Even more fun than Tomorrowland's Space Mountain.

Entourage (June 3)
I hated the series finale. I hated the final season. But, I'm holding out hope that this movie has everything that the first couple seasons had, which is a little swagger, a little edge, a lot cussing and a bunch of titties. Eh, who are we kidding. It will probably suck.

Jurassic World (June 12)
My daughter's birthday is June 11. I asked her what she wanted to do for her 9th birthday. "I want to see Jurassic World at the theater," she said. "Clever girl," I said. Sadly, she didn't get the joke.

Inside Out (June 16)
Pete Doctor's last Pixar effort (Up) won him an Academy Award for Best Animated Feature. After reading about the making of this film in Ed Catmull's Creativity Inc., I'm pretty excited to see what the talented minds at Pixar have come up with this year - with my kids in tow of course.

Dope (June 19)
The trailer looks a little like FRIDAY mixed with GO mixed with ENEMY OF THE STATE (or something like that). Hey, it's a high-school comedy with a nod to 90's hip hop. You gotta love that, right? Right?

Ant Man (July 17)
Why did Edgar Wright and Marvel part ways? That's the question that's going through my mind. That said, the trailer looks fun not to mention the footage that Wright created to sell the movie in the first place. How many times can I say Edgar Wright in this paragraph. Edgar Wright.

Trainwreck (July 17)
Comedian Amy Schumer writes and acts in a comedy directed by Judd Apatow? Sounds good to me. Let's hope it's a lot more succinct than Apatow's other directing efforts (e.g. 30 minutes shorter).

Pixels (July 24)
It's GHOSTBUSTERS meets 80's arcade games. What's there not to like from a summer flick - besides, of course, another Ghostbusters movie?

Southpaw (July 24)
Director Antoine Fuqua has some hits (Training Day) and misses (Olympus Has Fallen) with his directing decisions. But I think he made a good choice, even though the trailer looks like a little ROCKY mixed with RAGING BULL. Come to think of it, actor Jake Gyllenhaal looks like Jake LaMotta - so maybe this is a remake.

Vacation (July 29)
Judging by the trailer (which gives way too much away), it's ruder and it's cruder, almost like We're The Millers - but with a real family. But, it's Gen-X nostalgia that takes me back to the 80's and will get me back into the theater to see it. So why wouldn't I try to see Russ Griswold take his family cross country sans Chevy Chase and Beverly D'Angelo.

Mission Impossible-Rogue Nation (July 31)
Speaking of Mission Impossible, I'm a sucker for these films. Brad Bird injected a great storyline and some kick-ass action into the last installment (Ghost Protocol). Curious to see what Director Christopher McQuarrie (who directed Jack Reacher and The Way of the Gun and also won an Academy Award for his screenplay for The Usual Suspects) can do with Ethan Hunt and his disbanded IMF posse.

Straight Outta Compton (August 14)
Back in the early 80's my brother got me hooked on rap and hip-hop (Run DMC, Too Short, Sugarhill Gang, Beastie Boys, BDP, Eric B & Rakim, etc. etc.). I would make mix tapes from all of his store-bought cassette tapes and play them into the ground. Then I would make more. Then, he bought Straight Outta Compton. And it hit me like a freight train. The anger. The beats. The rhymes. The passion. The angst. It was the birth of gangsta rap. It was one of the first rap cassette tapes that I purchased outright. And, now, I can't wait to witness the strength of street knowledge in the theater.

THIS YEAR'S GUILTY SUMMER PLEASURE:
San Andreas (May 29)
The Rock. A fault line. An earthquake. Los Angeles destroyed. A big wave. Fire and explosions. Poorly written romantic plot. What more can you ask for in a mindless summer popcorn movie - besides, of course, a big monster?

Thursday, April 30, 2015

Eimer's Summer Hike - 2013 - Black Forest Trail

Every summer for the past 12 or 13 years, I've gone on some sort of summer hike with my friends. I've seen a lot of cool stuff.

Back in the summer of 2013, the crew decided to stay close to home. My buddy Drew McCauley found this 45-mile loop trail - Black Forest Trail - nestled in the middle of Pennsylvania (Slate, to be exact). This place would make a great horror movie. No cell phone service. No restaurants. And the rattlesnakes.

You know, I read about the rattlesnakes. I knew Pennsylvania had rattlesnakes. But, man, this trail was infested with the suckers. Although we saw only 3 rattlesnakes, I've heard horror stories by other travelers about seeing numerous rattlers on this trail - and by numerous - I mean more than 20.

I also ran into a local resident who told me that a park ranger took him on a hike down to this rattlesnake pit where all the rattlers roll around and mate. "It was disgusting and fascinating at the same time," he said.

In any event, check out my pics on Flickr and enjoy this video from my buddy Shaun Culbertson...

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Eimertoons - Work Caricature(s)

So, I was approached by some team members at work to create a 'logo' so they could attach to their internal podcast. While I'm not 100% comfortable creating caricatures of people, (I like to leave that stuff up to the seasoned professionals at Cedar Point), I took this on as a small challenge. That said, I'm fairly happy with the results.

One thing, as I move into the new millenium, I'm slowly, but surely, dipping my toe into illustrator and the creation of vector graphics. Haven't entirely figured out how to color vector images yet (the tutorials are so confusing and they make it look so damn easy).

But, one thing you'll notice are the fine, smooth bold lines surrounding the toons. It's a step into the future for Eimertoons. Regardless, the clients were happy with the final product, which is the most important thing, eh?